I’ve read Edgar Allan Poe, I’ve seen The Exorcist, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Rosemary’s Baby; I’ve even been to a Folk Festival – so I thought I’d witnessed what true horror was.
I was wrong.
The Bradley Wiggins Limited Edition Pinarello Dogma F8 is beyond my worst nightmares.
A stake should be driven through the saddle, it should then be cut into pieces, the pieces sealed in a tank of holy water and the abomination buried at a crossroads with it’s final resting place unrecorded by any marker or map.
It’s paint job unspoken of by human tongue – leave that to the jackals of Hades.
I’ve already spoken to Viktor, if you’re even so much as thinking about buying one or find yourself admiring one, Vik will counsel you.
There’ll be no charge for the sessions; thwarting the Prince of Darkness himself is reward enough for us.
Brilliant to see the girls racing in Qatar, right?
For a sport which is at the forefront of righteous indignation; ‘that damn Dodgy Kazakh buying that race from the Russian then having the affront to win the Olympic Road race, well …
Here at VeloVeritas we’re a little confused, you see we’ve had a wee peak at women’s rights in Qatar.
‘In some cases in Sharia-based family courts, a female’s testimony is worth half a man’s and in some cases a female witness is not accepted at all.’
Is one gem we came upon.
‘Adultery is punishable by death when a Muslim woman and a non-Muslim man are involved.
In 2006, a Filipino woman was sentenced to 100 lashes for adultery.’
Were another two interesting facts we unearthed without too much effort.
And if you’re Muslim and gay then you’re liable to the death penalty.
The sun always shines, the hotels are great and so are the expenses …
We know he’s not perfect and numerous crimes against the Viktor ‘Code of Cycling Ethics‘ have been committed – not least signing for Sky and dragging his missus and baby around with him – but we can’t help but respect the man.
Four wins and we’re not yet half way through February – let’s hope he can get over the Kemmel in Gent-Wevelgem, this year.
We Like Viviani
We like Viviani, he’s quick and pretty gallus – good to see him getting the stage win in Dubai, we think he’ll bump up Sky’s win rate in 2015.
But here’s the point, the Dubai stage won by Degenkolb atop the ramp had Geraint Thomas in the lead group.
But as Vik says;
“it never occurred to me to view Geraint as a potential winner, I thought Valverde but it never crossed my mind that Geraint might or could win.
“And that’s sad because he’s obviously such a talented laddie – but the Brit Sky boys aren’t motivated or capable of winning, they don’t have the hunger or the tactics.
“They can control a stage race but in a one day race or short stage race the likes of QuickStep run rings round them because they’re all winners and know exactly how to read a race.”
Not for the first time I find myself unable to argue with Vik’s logic.
I do have the role of resident ranter on the site; humble as I am at the feet of Vik – when his time is done he’ll join the Gods on Olympus as befits a ranter of his stature.
But when our editor, Martin initiates a rant then you know we have problems; ‘playlist!’ his email spluttered.
When I got into cycling around 1970, the Hour Record was held by that king of stylists Ole Ritter who’d wrested it from another sleek Chrono King, Ferdi Bracke.
Then along came Eddy Merckx; no stylist but a beast of a man who left a huge imprint upon the sport.
These men were kings of the sport, classy, tough, dignified, strong and fast.
Much as we admire Rohan Dennis’ 52.491 K ride we would remind our readers that Boardman rode 52.270 K in Bordeaux some 21 years ago on a bike which we think fulfills all current criteria.
But that’s by the by. The point is, should we really be encouraging and applauding ‘playlists’ for The Hour ?
The Hour Record demands dignity and gravitas; pumping 21st century music just doesn’t seem right to us.
But maybe we’re Dinosaurs, behind the times, longing for days that perhaps never even existed the way we remember them …
The GP Costa degli Etruschi is a cool race, the Italian season-opener; Cipo won it twice, Petacchi five times (six if you count the one he had taken away for ‘vitamin problems’.)
This year it was Manuel Belletti (Southeast) who nabbed it; a Giro stage winner in the past and one of a large group of rapid second tier Italian sprinters who’d kill for a win.
Just off the podium in fourth spot – Russ Downing (Cult Energy Pro Cycling).
Respect, Russell. Respect.